Monday, September 28, 2009

Homework Robot Syndrome

I think I have a nasty disease. It's called Homework Robot Syndrome. All day today, I have been chained to one textbook or another, copying out pointless excersises.

A sneak peek into my head: dimensional analysis. fml. density. wtf. chirstopher columbus. what a dick. mission indians. i need a nap. corn. i'm hungry. the spanish. oh crap i have spanish homework too. fmlfmlfml!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously, I can feel myself wasting away. The fun and creative and alive parts of my brain are turning to dust from suppression and disuse. The parts of me being used are the dull dead memorization and the mindless copying. Flesh slowly hardens into metal. Brains melt into textbook puree. Arm becomes an extension of pen, keyboard, and mouse. Legs shrivel away. Voice becomes a forgotten implement. Expressions withdraw into the face until there are only two large, vacant eyes, staring endlessly at the page or screen.

There were two instances today in which I felt alive at all:
1. When I went to go fly a kite for 10 minutes in my backyard (it was SO FUN until I had to go back inside)
2. When I chased my sister around the house for mocking me (that was fun until I realized I still had 50 more problems to do if I wanted to have a chance at not failing the chem test)

It really sucks. I hate not being able to talk to people. Not being able to create. Not being able to live.

Nell-Goodnight

Nell-Goodnight


This band beats pretty-boy dance groups who can only dance and look cute for the masses.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Help me...

Why is it that I can never stick to my morals?

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Adrenaline Rush

There's something very refreshing about posting an entry on a blog. Not like my first entry was anything to rave about, but when I clicked that PUBLISH button, it was like a rush of adrenaline electrified me with it's deadly pulse. I immediately wanted to post another entry, progressively turning into one of those all day, all the time bloggers. However I restrained myself, holding myself back from the infectious blogging disease. "A post a day, keeps the Psychoblogger Syndrome away." I told myself.

However, I still think I'm on a bad path, toward blogging about every little detail that no one cares about. Take now for instance. I just woke up about an hour ago. It's not like anything interesting has happened. I'm posting solely for the chance to feel that exciting adrenaline again. Like a drug, no?



Location: Somewhere in the neighborhood
Photographer: Me. (www.lookingglasschariots.deviantart.com)
Camera: Sony Cybershot DSC-H50
Editing: Piknik ;D

Friday, September 25, 2009

On Education


Everyday I go to a school crammed with 1000 students.  Scratch that.  I go to a ZOO crammed with 1000 students.  Oh yeah, we don't have walls either.  How are we supposed to focus in this kind of a work environment?  


Where has all of our taxpayer money gone to?  Instead of building a new theater and a swimming pool, that huge chunk of 
money should have been used to build walls in grimy, old High School South.  However, I am not here to discuss the fiscal decisions of our Board of Ed., nor rant about the shabby structures of our school.


Education fails in our school district, if not the entire country.  The only reason why students at WWP HSS succeed is due to the painstaking effort that they put into their academic work and activities.  I have yet to meet a teacher who greatly inspired me to pursue learning to the fullest extent.  


From the way our teachers teach us how to "learn" the subject, I have to say that either they don't know how to teach very well or they just don't enjoy their job.  Because of this, the learning process becomes a drudgery instead of an incentive to develop intellectually.


How does staring at a powerpoint for 45 minutes straight evoke a passionate desire to fully grasp the fundamentals of a social studies topic?  How does being placed in classes supervised by spaced-out and irresponsible teachers inspire students to develop good work ethics and time management?  Unless the student applies himself with more intensity, it is rather difficult to learn in such circumstances.


The way we are taught to learn is highly counterproductive.  We are forced to analyze and analyze and analyze some more.  This is evident especially when it comes to writing essays.  Our creative freedom is crushed with equivocating prompts.  We no longer can enjoy a book properly because of that essay due next week.  Furthermore, no one is properly taught how to write an essay.  Our language arts teachers never go fully into detail on how to craft a legitimate essay nor do they concentrate on our grammar and comprehension skills.  It's always an essay and then another essay and then another one.  To add some more bad news, the feedbacks that we receive from our teachers are flimsy and ambiguous.  But we students are at fault too.  We tend to be passive instead of being proactive.  We lounge lazily in our rooms when we could dig in deeper into the course material and discover new possibilities in scoring better on the next test.  Hence forth, we end up blaming our teachers for everything.    


I also believe that we students perform poorly academically because our schools try to cram too many subjects into our heads in one sitting.  Consequentially, we are forced to regurgitate that mishmash of reluctantly acquired information through tests and quizzes.  


Passive learning fails to enrich as much as active learning.  Take a look at Finland.  That country has the best educational system in the world.  There are several reasons for this.


1) Interactive learning is highly encouraged.


2) The best teachers are hired.


3) Classes are fun.  Therefore, the students actually enjoy the workload even if completing it means sacrificing free time.


4) All this is possible because the money is utilized for appropriate purposes.


The reason why the United States cannot compete with Finland on education is because the United States is a militaristic nation.  Too much of our taxpayer money has been allocated towards manufacturing arms and waging unnecessary wars.
If we students want to experience a whole new educational process that is more enriching and dynamic than ever before, our nation must first go through a paradigm shift.


The United States must dismantle all of its military posts from the world.  These establishments are a waste of money and resources.  Second, the United States economy must significantly reduce its dependence on war factories.  I cannot tell you just how perplexed I am at how much money our nation puts into and makes from generating killing machines and apocalypse-inducing man-of-war's.  Why should we spend all that money to blow up innocent citizens and destroy homes?  Why can't we use that money to renovate schools, aid students with learning disabilities, and help foreign students adjust  to their new environments?  Why must we always solve everything with violence?  Is this really what we want to leave in this chapter of American history, that the United States is willing to blow everyone up and that we Americans are bellicose, gun-loving, racists?  We must not repeat history.  Remember Vietnam.  Remember Iraq.


We should no longer enroll in jam-packed high schools and memorize pointlessly from textbooks and forget everything after an exam.  The maximum number of students per school should be limited to 300.  It is better to learn in a quiet space than in a hectic, wall-less environment.  


Interactive learning must be asserted strongly in kindergartens and primary schools.  This will motivate children to learn at a young age and succeed in their future academic careers.  Writing and economics should be taught intensively in middle schools.  If students firmly grasp the fundamentals of those two subjects, they will be set to pursue lucrative careers in their adulthood.  Once they finish middle school, specialized high schools shall be available to accommodate each student's respective interests in a certain subject.  Finally, the concept of "Ivy League" or "elite" universities should be abolished.  Every college and university must be equally prestigious and not be ranked above or below one another.   


Changing the American educational system would be equivalent to ameliorating the current American image.  With a newly improved schooling system, our nation shall conceive more critical thinking individuals.  We shall in turn, appoint future leaders that will guide our country alongside the morals that we have been fighting for since 1776.  We will no longer be a gun-loving people.  We will no longer be accused of supporting a system that takes innocent lives and segregates races.  We shall be progressive.  We shall prosper.  We shall lead with peace and freedom.  


My wishful thinking is that this change will take place soon.  However, I do not see that in the forecast.  Any sort of reform takes time.  For now, we must endure and make do with what we have.  Good luck to you all, fellow students.  I wish you luck at surpassing the banalities of our high school's educating methods and hope that one day, all this will change forever.





Contradiction

It seems like all anybody wants to be anymore is different. To "fight the system". To "stand out". And for some reason, that includes having the iPod with the most bands that no one has ever heard of. This has become such a fad that it has developed it's own little stereotype. The "nonconformity" stereotype.

Unfortunately, I must admit that I have fallen into this little group of people. If everyone wants this one, I want that. It's a nasty little habit, I must admit. Picking for the sake of it being the least picked, I mean. But I guess that's who I am after a point. Someone whose trying too hard to stand out. Like most teenagers.

Didn't we all feel so darn great when we were the only ones who new about "3OH!3" and "Death Cab for Cutie", bands that are very popular now. And all of a sudden, it isn't cool anymore to listen to them...because everybody does.



I actually thought this comically fit into the topic.
Skinnies, dirty converse, vintage setting. You know the drill.

Location: Bathroom at my mom's office. ._.
Photographer: Me. www.lookingglasschariots.deviantart.com
Camera: Sony Cybershot DSC-H50
Editing: Picnik (LOL)
And..those feet belong to me :D

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

PassionFruitJuice

This is so cool. I've never written on a blog before so thank you for this experience, Minjeh.

Due to the somewhat emo (or at least deep and profound) nature of all previous posts, I am not going to write the usual completely bs-ed random fairy tales that I usually write. I'm going to tell the slightly emo story behind my favorite random story that I've ever written: PassionFruitJuice.
The story started one random day in math when I was in seventh grade. But although many of my friends have read parts of it or know the storyline, I've never told the story behind why it was written. It was more than just a way to kill time and produce giggles. It was the way I expressed the deep and intense love I had felt for the boy who became PassionFruitJuice.

When I was in sixth grade, I fell in love with PassionFruitJuice. You may think that a sixth grader knows nothing about love, but I definitely believed I was in true, deep love. And since I am a person of extremes, I threw my complete existence into loving him. Every song I heard spoke volumes to me about him. Every romantic book I read was the story of him and me in an alternate dimension. Anything he asked for, I gave him. Every word he said to me was like a golden drop of nectar and ambrosia. Every night, I dreamed of him, I fell asleep thinking of him, wishing with every fiber of my soul that he would care about me too.

Because that was the problem. He didn't care about me. He didn't give a shit about me. I could have been run over by a bus, stabbed to pieces by a ferocious bloodsucking monster, and he would not even have blinked. You see, he liked pretty girls. And that obviously does not describe me. So despite my nauseating dedication, he treated me like moldy underwear or something nasty like that.

Every night, I would go home and cry. I would cry because he didn't like me. Because I wasn't good enough for him. Because my life was a faliure. Because I had nothing better to do. Because I truly believed with my heart and soul that I was completely and irrevocably in love with him.

This story, PassionFruitJuice, is the only good thing that came out of those 3 years of love and dedication. For three years, I loved him. For three years, I cried. The only time being in love with PassionFruitJuice brought me joy was when I was writing the story.

In the story, AnyaRose (that's what I called myself) is the one with the power. She's like a super-me. PassionFruitJuice needs her. He depends on her. He cares about her. And it's predictable from page one (well actually page 5) that she and PassionFruitJuice are destined to be together. What's more, PassionFruitJuice is going to change his ways and become a better person in realizing this love for her. WHY ISN'T THE UNIVERSE LIKE THIS!?

Actually, I know why. It's because PassionFruitJuice was and still is a total dick. I was just so blinded by being in love with him that it didn't matter what he did, I would always put the blame on myself.

How's that for a deep, profound, take on what everyone thought was the funnest, randomest, non-deep/profoundest thing ever???